sometimes i wonder if my families the normal one and everyone else's family's just messed up, or, the other way around.
one things for sure, my family does not fit in with the rest of my dad's family.
1. my mother is far from being a priss.
2. my dad is the hardest working s.o.b. out there
3. my brother may be weird, but he's smart as hell.
as for the rest of my dads family.
1. my aunt(s) are absolute morons when it comes down to anything serious
2. my uncle didn't even SHOW up to our christmas.
3. all, i mean all 4 of my cousins reeeally need to get out more.
this is what happens. we show up at nonnas for christmas dinner, and before we leave, my mom takes a good look at my brother, my dad and my grandma, and then herself, and she looks at me, and says 'god, everyone's going to think were the emo/goth 666 family, we're dressed in all black and gray'. i burst into laughter and nick rolled his eyes, as did my dad. my grandmother doesnt know what emo or goth is, so she just kind of agreed and said 'we do look a bit bland'.
we arrive and nonna takes one look at me and says 'where is my beautiful granddaughter' and i obviously say 'right here' and she says 'you'll never be as beautiful as you were when you didn't have that thing in your nose' so i immediately stuck it up in my nose where it was hidden, then she smiled and says 'there she is' and adorned me with italian kisses.
the night progresses, and my aunts and my grandmother drink more and more. and i listen to stupid stories about how my aunt went to limeridge and they were supposed to try on a 34B cup but she tried on a 34A cup, she thought it was hilarious...
so it's time for opening gifts, and i really hate this part of the night.
and i know hates a strong word, but i actually think i hate opening gifts.
i'm appreciative, and i love my family, but god damn, they don't know me at all.
first gift i open, was a very nice black sweater, and i love it, it's a really nice sweater, but not really my style, oh well, i put it on because i was freezing, it did look really nice. so my 2 cousins, who are girls, open there gifts, nice, matching guess sweaters. just what they wanted.
i get this bigger box, maybe hoping for something a little more my style this year, but.. i open it, and it's a brown, poofy, sweater from suzy sheir, 'wow, thanks, this will look lovely on a rainy day when i'm not going out and have NOTHING ELSE TO WEAR'. i put it away in the box and give my mother this look, and she just knowwwws what i'm thinking, and she just laughs and whispers 'hey, at least it's my size, at least if zia carol comes to our house and sees me wearing it, maybe she'll get the hint'. i take a deep breathe, and my mom hands my 2 cousins there presents, they open them, and it's a 25 dollar gift card for la senza (sweet gift if you ask me), they're stoked.
my last present, from my nonna. i love her to death, but she is a horrible gift buyer. so, both my cousins open there gifts, and what do they get, an absolutely gorgeous guess bracelet, with the little heart charm.
i open my box, which again, is a bit bigger.
a polka dot, tommy hilfiguer pajama set.
i didn't say one fucking word. after a few very, very deep breath's, i said thanks nonna, and headed outside for a fucking smoke.
now, this may seem selfish, and ignorant, and yah, yah, yah, i should be thankful i got something.
but if you don't know what to get me, don't get me anything at all. or maybe fucking call me, and say 'look vanessa, i don't know what to get you for christmas, give me something you'd like'
the pajamas and the suzy sweater still had the prices on them, 25, marked down to 10, marked down to 899.
sometimes i wonder what goes through the head of my aunts. by the way, my zia carol, does all my nonna's shopping. so im certainly not blaming my nonna, she cooks a wonderful and delicious dinner, and houses us all at christmas time and lets me drink her rum, but god damn, she has got to get someone else to do her christmas shopping.
every year christmas keeps getting more and more disappointing.
but, i do love them, all of them, no matter how stupid they may seem, and how cheap they are, and how they don't even show up to the most important holiday of all. it's okay.
they're just a little funny, and a little foreign.
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